NEW YEARS VLOG IS LIVE!!!

Heyyyy!!! Okay, so, here's the deal. I know I said I was going to record this with my Canon, but I have been sick for several days now and the last thing I feel like doing is dealing with the process of filming and editing 😂 sssoOoOoOoooooo, I hope the HORRIBLE webcam quality is enough to suffice. DO YOU ALL REALLY EVEN NEED TO SEE MY SICK SELF SO CLEARLY??? No. Probs not. I was looking pretty rough, fam. I still want to try and make some videos for the blog with my camera, though. I've always had a fascination with videography, but it's something I haven't really played with since I was probably 13. So that'll be fun. But without further adeiu, here's the vlog!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY MY AWKWARD SELF <3




FAVORITE INSTAGRAM ACCOUNTS:
(in no order)

@jacyraynunbroken (lol bc bff)
@katerinad17 and her sister @ninette1998
@juliannacreating
@bonniekatez
@soelsister
@imhaleyjane
@haileydevine
@lydcaroline
@okay and basically all my blog friends because I cANNOT choose between any of you all!!!
Seriously, the blogger community has some serious talent.


NEW YEARS Q&A VLOG (aka give me your questions plz lol)



YEP. You're reading that right. I am FINALLY doing a blogger Q&A! *throws confetti*
I did one awhile back, but it was exclusively for the "aesthetic baegels" group chat and the rest of you didn't get to ask me anything :'( So, I figured with the new year it would be the perfect time to do one!

So, ask away! Your questions can totally be New Year's related/questions about 2016, and what not, or you can just ask casual questions! Or, I mean, both. 😂

// DEADLINE IS SUNDAY, JAN. 15TH //

Maybe that's an early deadline. Idk. But I hope to have this up next Tuesday, and I'm also very anxious to use the new camera I got for Christmas, haha!

A S K    A W A Y ! ! !

-aaliyah

IT'S OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY (BUT DON'T LET THAT STEAL YOUR JOY)



I'm just going to be honest with you.

Things are not completely alright right now. This is not an invitation to my Pity Party. I really almost didn't even post this. And I know, I just posted a really vulnerable and "HERE IS ALL MY FEELS TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT" post, but oh well. I'm not perfect, and you need to be reminded of that, haha!

A lot of things have been going on lately that I really don't feel like needs to be posted all over the internet, lol, but it has left me really disappointed and hurt and very confused. Just one of those things where you miss how things used to be, but you know this is what needs to happen, too much drama, and so many emotions and confusion that you don't even know what to do or how to act.

I feel like while writing this and the times I've opened up to a few people I'm close to, I'm making it sound like I'm really depressed and that's not the case. Actually, I am in the best point of my life right now. I think I'm going to write another post soon about my season of depression and getting out of that soon to explain this better. I have found a peace and joy in the Lord that I don't think I've ever felt before. But it doesn't matter how joyful you are, life will still throw things your way.



But I'm not here to whine.
The point is is that I have a God who can heal all this hurt.
My God will never disappoint me.
He never causes confusion.
And if he stabs my heart with anything, it's going to be with love.
He is One I can trust.
And no matter what comes my way, I know he is going to work it out because he holds my future in His hands. All I have to do is do my part in serving Him how I'm supposed to. He will sort out all the kinks, untie all the tangled threads. And honestly, the only way I'm staying afloat is because I know that no matter what, I can trust in this truth.


<< G O D ' S   G O T   T H IS >>




It's okay to hurt. It's okay to cry.
And on that note, don't ever hold back tears. Just don't. Some people think crying is a weakness, or they just hate crying, but don't. Cry. Trust me, it helps.
Lately, I haven't been able to cry. I've had every emotion at one time, it feels like. I'm sad, I'm mad, I'm disappointed, I'm hurt, I'm stressed, and even through all those awful emotions, I'm still joyful and peaceful. It's a crazy whirlwind of emotions, wow.
I can't cry. I feel like I have so many contradicting emotions that it's causing me to just be overwhelmed and not know what to do. Crying helps me. I don't know why, but it does. So I try to cry, but I can't. I just can't. And that just causes even more frustration to build up, lol. So a couple nights ago, when I finally could cry, I was literally sobbing. I haven't sobbed like that in.... Wow, I couldn't even tell you when. But it helped. Sometimes you just need to stay up sobbing until 2am. It just cleanses your soul, y'all. CRYING HELPS. CRYING IS NOT A WEAKNESS. TRUST ME. ❤



Back to what I was saying originally, it's okay to not be okay. But don't let that steal your peace and joy. The devil will use any misfortunate circumstance to try to make you feel depressed and hopeless, but guess what, love? You have authority and power over the enemy. You are an heir to the throne and you have full ability to throw him out of your mind. Don't let him whisper lies in your ear.

My pastor gave a wonderful analogy at church the other night. When you are in full armor (as you should be, right ;) Ephesians 6:11) and the enemy is in your ear, you can lift your arm and hit him with your sword. And, as I'm sure you know, the Bible is your sword. Defeat the enemy with the Word. If he is telling you lies, you fight back. Quote scripture. If you are fighting a battle, you have to constantly stay in the Word and feed yourself with truth. Because I know at least for me, as soon as I don't, I start to believe the lies. Don't let that happen!


<< Y O U   H A V E   A U T H O R I T Y   A N D   P O W E R   O V E R   T H E   E N E M Y >>



This post is seriously all over the place, but I felt the need to write. I actually haven't been able to write. Not even journal. I just.. can't. So this felt very good to get this off my chest. I love you all so much. Thank you for being so encouraging to me. 💙
DISCLAIMER AGAIN: I am okay. I am not in any way depressed, I'm just being really raw and honest with you all! I hope this can be an encouragement. 
STAY STRONG. KEEP GOING.
-aaliyah

THE PAST MONTH OF MY LIFE IN A SERIES OF UNEDITED PICTURES

 Hey, you all!!! IT'S BEEN WAY TOO LONG. I sincerely apologize for the lack of posts. I have had a very serious case of writer's block on top of a super busy schedule. I'm not promising that I'm going to be busting out the posts like crazy again but I am going to try! 💗 But for today, I decided to show you what the past month has looked like for me through series of unedited pictures! These pictures are in no way "aesthetic", haha. Some of these I have posted on my Instagram, but these are raw photos. You'll see that I spend time with pretty much two friends, I'm always at church, and it's just a good life, y'all. Hehe. There's no fancy formatting, just a good 'ole life update. SO LET'S GET INTO IT, SHALL WE???



OCTOBER 9TH, 2016
---------------------------
On this day we went to a local pumpkin patch with my church family! It was a blast. Here pictured is my lovely friend, Kendra, as we get lost walk through the corn maze!



OCTOBER 14TH, 2016
----------------------------
The first time I'd seen one of my best friends, Veronica, in a good while! We hadn't even talked that day but we ended up sorta matching, hahaha. It was pretty funny. 



OCTOBER 17TH-22ND, 2016
-----------------------------------
We celebrated Sukkot for the first time this year. It was a lot of fun. We had people over nearly every night and we ate and sang and had a good time around the fire.





OCTOBER 22ND, 2016
-----------------------------
Walmart adventures before we headed to a fall festival/bonfire that my church was having. What a night. I love my church family so much. And anytime I can sit around a fire playing music with my favorite people is a good time. 💙






OCTOBER 27TH, 2016
-----------------------------
My church has an AMAZING food ministry which my family helps work! This includes a lot of time spent at church and late nights, but I don't mind a bit! It's so rewarding. 



OCTOBER 28TH, 2016
-----------------------------
On this day, my church attended a youth rally at my friend Dakota's church. It was such a good service. And afterward, they had a bonfire! And apparently, it's just a custom for their church to roast bacon (yes, you read that right) over the fire. I wasn't going to try it but Dakota insisted and made me a piece 😂 I have to admit... It tasted AMAZING. Try it, lol.



NOVEMBER 5TH, 2016
----------------------------
This day my friends, Dakota and Veronica, were both over and my brothers had some friends over as well, so we decided to all walk down to Lake Cumberland. It's literally right through the woods behind my house! We had a blast! (Veronica took these pictures)





NOVEMBER 6TH, 2016
-----------------------------
To quote my Instagram caption, 
"If there were ever a picture to describe how different our styles are... I think it'd be this one."



NOVEMBER 7TH, 2016
-----------------------------
This day we took a short trip to Tennessee! My niece was visiting with us so we had to take her back to my sister anyways, so we decided to just stay the night and do some stuff! Veronica was off school for four days, I believe, so she was able to go with us! 

(YES I HAVE HER UNDER "FAT LARD" ON SNAPCHAT, VERYYYY LONG STORY LOL)


(When you try to get an aesthetic picture of you drinking your morning coffee, but your mom photobombs and your brother shakes while he takes the picture :'))
(THE VANS STORE WAS A DREAM 😍)
(last stop: Dixie Stampede!)

NOVEMBER 9TH, 2016
------------------------------
My mom got my friend Dakota and I matching Converse shirts while we were in TN! So here is us sporting them, lol.



NOVEMBER 15TH, 2016
----------------------------
I received a letter from one of my absolute FAVORITE blog friends!!! Grace Anne, this was so lovely! *sobs*



NOVEMBER 19TH, 2016
------------------------------
 Little baby Mercy!!! She's growing up so fast. I just can't get over how cute she looks in this hat, haha!



NOVEMBER 21ST, 2016
-----------------------------
What else do you do on a sick day but play with Snapchat, watch Downton Abbey, and drink tea?!
And yes, I'm all better now, but it was a rough four days! I still wasn't even feeling that great on Thanksgiving. BUT I'M ALL GOOD NOW SO IT'S FINE!



NOVEMBER 23RD, 2016
-------------------------------
Some of my LITERAL FAVORITE BLOGGERS EVER and I had our first video call!! 
It was me, AbbieKatieRachel, and MaryShelley! Hopefully, next time we will have Olivia and Grace Anne join us ;) then all the "aesthetic baegels" will be together, haha! 



NOVEMBER 24TH, 2016
-------------------------------
And of course, can't forget yesterday. Thanksgiving! Here is a picture of pie, because honestly, the only decent pictures I have from yesterday.. are of pie... 😂




I hope you enjoyed seeing what my life has looked like this past month! It's been crazy, but I wouldn't have had it any other way! 
-aaliyah xx